Crystal

Much ado about nothing… (sorry Bard!)

How many of you have gone skinny dipping ?

‘What’s that?’, I nudged my neighbour.

‘It is the simple act of swimming wearing nothing but the skin.’

When half the room rose in affirmation is the moment I realised what a waste my life had been.

According to my new policy ‘try everything’, I decided to explore my chances. I read that my locality had banned birthday suits in the pools and the angry naturalists are up in arms against it.

So the other alternative was Wreck Beach, the nude beach or the clothing optional beach in Vancouver. It was short listed to be one of the seven wonders of Canada but lost. Sure... people have an irrational fear of naked skin.

The Naturism society here has a string of programs to attract the young and old.

In July there was the family day on the beach with

SANDCASTLE BUILDING, BODY PAINTING, KITE FLYING AND NUDE ART SHOW. PARTICIPANTS GOT CERTIFICATES, AND RIBBONS! (....um a piece of fabric!)

On Aug 12^th the guys are hosting a 5 kilometer ‘Bare buns run’ at 11.30 a.m.

Dogs are not allowed. Obviously we cannot trust our four legged friends with so much raw flesh.

Just rub a lavish amount of the 15 lettered chemical with a 30+ SPF to deal with the sun and you are ready to go. Some dipilatory cream and losing an extra pound will definitely add to the visual impact.

No constrains or restrains. The only drawback would be no pocket for the cell phone.

All nations have their share of nude beaches. Of course not in India. America has the most, no one can outstrip their freedom.

I wonder who clothed us in the name of civilization! It is against the natural instincts. Babies kick away the clothes. May be they hear an internal voice like an answering machine giving the true information. Anyway the females of the species have taken the clue quickly and is on the track to baredom.

Adam and Eve were buck naked and happy before the apple saga. The Neantherdal dudes walked the earth unclothed. Later the leafy wraps were to protect from bugs and weather, right? When we live in conditioned comforts............ who needs clothes! I doubt if we have interfered with evolution. We could have possibly developed some secondary covering like a temperature regulatory suit by leaving everything to nature.

Actually exposing the skin is our birth right. If Michelangelo and Botticelli could find beauty in nudity…..it is the uncouth mind with no aesthetic sense that would smirk at it.

When people realise it ….sure...it is the doomsday for the clothing industry.

                             

Look at the positive side. 

If $20 billion is spent every year on skin care products why not flaunt the largest organ? We are gift wrapped in the elastic skin which is wash and wear, colour-fast with crease free warranty for at least 30 years. 

How much dough and time could be saved by cutting short on clothing and the shopping! It could be then used creatively on nuclear physics or space tech.

At the airports no time will be wasted on  the security beeps unless there is an insert job.

In winter, science can get us into a ‘terminator’ kind of bubble to make life easy.

The younger generation tends to show least interest in the naked truth. Nudism could be walking the road of extinction if we do not take quick measures.

My first step was to cheer the runners. I approached my friend, ‘Can we.....eh...go to...Wreck Beach?'

'Sure.....I wanna see some whacos who look like disfigured subway sandwiches!'

I have not given up the idea though.